Free Linux and OpenOffice - even if your email address doesn't

[Patrick Finnegan]

At least this post was somewhat entertaining to read...

On Monday 01 September 2008, Ray Arachelian wrote:
> You might as well have said:
> > And that, my liege, is how we know the earth to be banana-shaped.
>
> So that I might reply "This new learning amazes me, Sir Bedevere.
> Explain again how sheep's bladders may be employed to prevent
> earthquakes."
>
> "Eh. You are indeed brave, Sir Knight, but the fight is mine."
>
> "Quick, what... is the air-speed velocity of an unladen swallow?"
>
> "Exactly. So, logically...    If... she... weighs... the same as a
> duck,... she's made of wood.    And therefore?  A witch!"
>
> "Eh. You are indeed brave, Sir Knight, but the fight is mine."
>
> "Look, I'll have your leg.  [chop]   What are you going to do, bleed
> on me?"
>
> "The Black Knight always triumphs! Have at you! Come on, then." [2nd
> leg chopped] "Oh? All right, we'll call it a draw."
>
> "Oh. Oh, I see. Running away, eh?"
>
> "    We're Knights of the Round Table.
>     Our shows are formidable,
>     But many times we're given rhymes
>     That are quite unsingable.
>     We're opera mad in Camelot.
>     We sing from the diaphragm a lot."
>
> "    In war we're tough and able,
>     Quite indefatigable.
>     Between our quests we sequin vests and impersonate Clark Gable.
>     It's a busy life in Camelot."
>
> " I have to push the pram a lot."
>
> " Well, on second thought, let's not go to Camelot. It is a silly
> place."
>
> "Oh, no. Oh, no! Bad, bad Zoot!"
>
> "Oh, wicked, bad, naughty Zoot! She has been setting alight to our
> beacon, which, I have just remembered, is grail-shaped. It's not the
> first time we've had this problem."
> ( http://www.mwscomp.com/movies/grail/cut.au )
>
> "Oh. Um, l-- look, i-- i-- if we built this large wooden badger--"
>
> And the Lord spake, saying, 'First shalt thou take out the Holy Pin.
> Then, shalt thou count to three. No more. No less. Three shalt be the
> number thou shalt count, and the number of the counting shall be
> three. Four shalt thou not count, nor either count thou two,
> excepting that thou then proceed to three. Five is right out. Once
> the number three, being the third number, be reached, then, lobbest
> thou thy Holy Hand Grenade of Antioch towards thy foe, who, being
> naughty in My sight, shall snuff it.'
>
> "Listen. Strange women lying in ponds distributing swords is no basis
> for a system of government. Supreme executive power derives from a
> mandate from the masses, not from some farcical aquatic ceremony."
>
> "You've got two empty halves of coconut and you're bangin' 'em
> together."
>
> "How you English say, 'I one more time, mac, unclog my nose in your
> direction', sons of a window-dresser!"
>
> Instead, "We shall say 'ni' again to you if you do not appease us...
> We want... a shrubbery!       One that looks nice.  And not too
> expensive. Now... go!"
>
> ...
>
> "Oh, what sad times are these when passing ruffians can say 'ni' at
> will to old ladies. There is a pestilence upon this land. Nothing is
> sacred. Even those who arrange and design shrubberies are under
> considerable economic stress at this period in history."
>
> "Fetchez la vache!
> And now, remain gone, illegitimate-faced bugger-folk! And, if you
> think you got a nasty taunting this time, you ain't heard nothing
> yet, dappy English k-nnniggets! Thpppt!"



-- 
Purdue University Research Computing ---  http://www.rcac.purdue.edu/
The Computer Refuge                  ---  http://computer-refuge.org